The Grave stones
Like soldiers the grave
stones stood to attention waiting for their next order. The luscious green
grass enveloped the grave. Huge trees surrounded the grave shading the gloomy
graves. Misty spirits loomed. Trees loomed over grave stones creating dark dark
shadows. An eerie silence is created by spooky spirits. Grave stones, basking
in the sunshine, stood still like statues. Trees as tall as skyscrapers, waving
around making a whoosh, whoosh, whoosh! It was like a warning that something
was about to happen…
wow!Iman this realy created suspence and you have got some good ajectives in here.
ReplyDelete* Next time try not to repeat that many words.
I like yojur similes and vocabulary. Maybe, next time you can focus on keeping the tense consistent.
ReplyDeleteThis peice of work is fantastic!
ReplyDeletei love how you used powerfull adjestives to describe the graveyard
EG:enveloped,misty,loomed.
*I think you should've used a different word for huge.
This piece of work is fabulous!
ReplyDeleteI loved how you used powerful adjectives to describe the graveyard eg; enveloped, misty, loomed,lucious.
* I think ou could have used some short sentences for effect.
Great work you've used some powerful adjectives such as misty loomed and lucious *Next time use less powerful adjectives beacause their to powerful and to powerful can be not good* Anyways Well Done!!!
ReplyDelete